I'm scared of God

I think God appreciates a little healthy fear, the way you revere your father before you hit puberty, but I don't think God wants us to be scared of him, yet I am. Lives around me are falling apart, and it makes me scared. One friend's wife has been (falsely, I think) accused of their son's murder, and will likely face the death penalty. Another family lost their son and grandson in a car accident....another friend's wife simply ran away on him!

Perhaps I have been too sheltered to this point in my life. These things rock me to my very core, and they make me fearful. Yet somehow I know that I'm missing something about God's character. He is surely just, but he's also more loving than I can imagine.....but why then, do these friend's of mine suffer? I know, God tells us this will happen, it's all over the New Testament, but I suppose I don't want to believe it. I want to believe we live a smiley-faced life and then go to heaven. But we don't. Or some don't. And I also know this is ultimately for good and God's glory, but right now I cannot seem to wrap my heart around that. I find myself praying for an easy go at things instead of the Lord's will. Is that wrong? It feels wrong. I think what it comes down to is that I love this place....Earth that is. It's not so bad. Or it hasn't been for me. But it's not our home. God is preparing a home for us elsewhere. A home where there are no car accidents with drunk drivers behind the wheel, a place where murder will not take place. A glorious place to enjoy Him forever. But I have lost sight of this. I like living here. And now I'm scared that God will allow some discomfort in my life. How foolish! Heaven awaits!